Welcome to My New (surviving life) Blog

Be yourself; Everyone else is already taken.

— Oscar Wilde.

This is the first post on my new blog. I’m just getting this new blog going, so stay tuned for more. Subscribe below to get notified when I post new updates.

Update on me

Heres an update on me! My life has been pretty hectic. There for awhile I was working 3 jobs but am now down to 2. Working so much has been draining me physically and mentally. My depression has been kicking my ass. I’ve had more sad days than happy days. Some days I just want it to end but I remeber my life and how blessed I am. And some days I just feel like my life is falling apart. But besides everything going on I’m doing good.

Things are good with me and my fiance. We have been experiencing problems but we have a game plan in motion and finally starting to accomplish what we both want. And that’s a bittersweet moment.

What are some things you’d like to see in my blog? I need ideas or is just talking about my life helping others? Some days I just dont know.

Update on me and Words of Affirmation

This post is going to be two post into one. An update on me and the next love language. So I haven’t been blogging much because I have been depressed. Not wanting to do anything let alone take care of myself. Its been overwhelming.I can only imagine how my fiance feels after he is left to pick up the pieces. i have let my chores go and that’s not okay. I have even let work suffer. To day I am feeling much better and more like myself so I decided to write.

Words of Affirmation. This is where the primary love language is to use words. Kind words, encouraging words. Words speak louder than actions in this case. Things you could do to speak their language are but not limited to:

  • say how terrific they are
  • say I love you
  • write a card

Some things to avoid is harsh words and criticism.

This love language is pretty simple. Just communicate with your significant other and use your words to express your love for them. Communication is key!

Quality time

I will just jump into the third love language.

Quality time. That is when you spend time together while being present and giving your full undivided attention. Turn off the televisions and put the phones away and be present. Love really is spelt T-I-M-E with these people.

Some examples are:

  • going for a walk and talking about your day
  • meeting for lunch
  • taking a weekend trip with the children
  • preplanned thoughtful date
  • family vacation
  • quality conversation
  • gardening together
  • working out together
  • cooking together

A successful quality time sesh will include one of the following:

  • one or both of you want to do it
  • the other person is willing
  • you both know that you are expressing your love to each other through this activity

There are some things to avoid when you are in a relationship where the person speaks this love language. The first thing is to avoid distractions. The second, is postponed dates. This is a big no no. And last not listening. They love when you can listen to each other and have conversations.

Remember quality time is the most important thing to this person. So conversate it up!

Receiving gifts

Love is an amazing thing when you get it figured out. Part of it is figuring out the person’s love language. So on to the next love language.

Receiving gifts. Gifts and gestures show that you are known, loved, and cared for. They thrive on the thoughtfulness and effort behind a visual representation of love. The best gifts are the most meaningful. If you struggle to know what gift to get then just ask them! Its the thought that counts.

Examples of these gift ideas are but not limited to:

  • engagement ring
  • flowers
  • trinket with their favorite tv show, animal or band
  • memento from meaningful date
  • bring home their favorite treat
  • a trip they have always wanted to go
  • the thing they have talked about wanting
  • the gift of yourself

Actions to avoid when dealing with these people is to avoid forgetting birthdays and anniversaries. Another thing to avoid is thoughtless gifts.

As long as the gift is thoughtful they typically will accept. Remember and I can not stress enough, it is the thought that counts.

Acts of service

In my I wish I had known series I touched base with the five love languages. This week I will go into more detail about the languages.

The first one we are going to talk about is acts of service. The things you do to ease the responsibilities of your significant other. This means a lot to the person with acts of service as their love language. Action speak louder than words with these people. It can be misinterpreted. But communication is key. Just simply ask them and they will tell you.

Some examples of acts of service are:

  • doing the dishes or laundry
  • washing their car
  • running errands for them
  • fixing things around the house
  • helping them with a project
  • doing things without being asked
  • sacrificing what you want to do for them

There are some things to avoid when dealing with these people who primary love language is acts of service. First of all they dislike laziness. Secondly they dislike broken commitments. And last but not least they dislike making more work for them.

As this week continues look out for your love language. You will know once you read it which one is yours. You can have multiple but one will speak strongly towards you. As you read I want you to think about which love language you are and communication. This won’t necessarily make the relationship easier but it will help out all parties involved.

Update on me

Update about me. It has been a busy crazy few weeks. My fiance and I celebrated our 7th year of being together. We went camping and kayaking and it was so much fun. Then I started a new job. Now mind you right now I have 3 jobs. I work at a pizza place full time. I babysit part of the time and only have a couple weeks with the kid left due to this other job (tear). And now I’ve started a call center job that is working from home.

With all of this going on how does this affect my bipolar disorder? Well I am super busy, but I would not change it. I am on a schedule that works for me and I do not have to worry about money as much. The point of all these jobs is to get me ahead with everything. I am so tired of living paycheck to paycheck.

So what kind of emotions am I feeling? Well sometimes I feel overwhelmed like I am doing to much. But then I remember why I am doing it for me and my fiance to get ahead, to start saving money. Money stresses me out but my bills are paid and I have food in my belly. However, I want to get back into painting and other things like that, that has the potential to make me more money. I get anxious when I start to think about my schedule. Like can I really do this and keep up with it? The answer yes I can!

But mentally I am in a good spot despite these feelings. I feel on top of the world and that I can accomplish what I set out to accomplish. Well there you have it folks–an update.

Personality and behavior

I wish I had known…

…that personality profoundly influences behavior.

Our personality greatly influences our behavior for many reasons. So what kind of personality do you have? Lets take a look at the different personalities.

Half full or half empty? The pessimist and optimist are typically attracted to each other. The pessimist sees the glass as half full. Where as the optimist sees it as half full. The optimist will be a risk taker because in their mind everything will be fine. The pessimist is the exact opposite and thinks the worst will happen. You have to find a common middle ground for this to work with both personalities.

Neatniks and slobs. The neatniks are clean freaks that like everything in order and clean. The slob could care less about whether or not the place is clean and in order. But again opposites attract.

When the dead sea weds a babbling brook. This means when one person is very talkatve, the other is usually quiet. These two mix very well together. The babbling brook will fill up the evening talking and the dead sea will just agree typically because they are more quiet and reserved.

Passives and aggressives. The aggressive partner will pursue what they want, what they believe to be right, or what they think should happen. The passive partner will be pleased with plans and charts of the future.

Professors and dancers. Some people are very logical. This is the professor. The intuitive partner is the dancer. Both are very good ways of processing life. If you try to force each other into your own personality mold it can result in a lifetime spent in conflict.

The organizer and the free spirit. The organizer is a planner. They give their attention to detail. The free spirit thinks the plans will take care of themselves.

To better understand your personality here’s a list and mark them 1-10. 1 being the lowest and 10 being the highest. The numbers next to each thing is what I would rate myself.

  • optimistic–3
  • pessimistic–8
  • neat–1
  • messy–10
  • babbling brook–6
  • dead sea–3
  • pointer–2
  • painter–10
  • aggressive–4
  • passive–8
  • logical–1
  • intuitive–10
  • organizer–10
  • spontaneous–2